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What's with the
mask? He's not fool enough to give up his day job, that's what!
How
do you know when your GaAs fab is for sale?
Lately there seems to be some
consolidation in the industry. In 2004, Bookham closed the fab line
that invented MMICs... Celeritek is sold. Analogics might soon go
fabless... and there's still way too many GaAs fab lines out there.
Seems to us that in five years, there might not be a foundry other
than pure-play, with the exception that each defense electronics
contractor is going to keep his own III-V group as a hobby shop,
because the battle of the "mission systems integrators"
will get bloody all the way down to the fab trenches, and there
will always be "DARPA hard" projects to milk. Heck, even
Boeing might have their own boutique fab, they own 1/3 of Hughes
Research Labs, right? Let's start a rumor here right now, that in
2006 LockMart will have a nice fab center somewhere north of Dallas...
Anyhow, below we have compiled
some things to look out for, in case your GaAs fab is about to be
sold.
- The cafeteria menu is suddenly
and without explanation improved dramatically... enjoy it while
it lasts! Perhaps the Cafeteria workers have started wearing Sodexho
badges.
- Ordering new business cards
is "temporarily" not allowed.
- A visitor's facility tour
"accidentally" finds a stash of platinum sputtering
targets in a the pipe chase.
- Finance has started putting
asset tags on every last pair of tweezers in the building.
- Other company's financial
literature is found in the bathroom stall the executives use.
- You see facilities dudes outside,
up on a ladder, using a tape measure to make measurements of the
building's sign.
- You see your entire company
on the Dovebid website as
a single item for sale.
- IT helpdesk no longer answers
calls that have been on hold for an hour.
- The parking lot is finally
getting paved and striped.
- Internet access seems broken
all week, especially to sites like Excite and Google news... and
email seems extremely sluggish, especially if you are sending
attachments such as resumes.
- New "tour guide"
signs appear outside the fab bay windows, with graphs showing
99 percent RF yield.
- There is a "RE/MAX"
sign in front of the building.
- The supremely disgusting visitor
bunny suits have been deepsixed, and a nice selection of new ones
in all sizes (including weasel) is in stock.
- Certain hallways are being
painted, ones which are connected to the general manager's office
and the reception area.
- "Inspirational"
posters are being hung over cracks in the wall.
- The visitor lot has a $100,000
Porsche parked in it.
- A Mexican landscaping crew
is not just pulling weeds, but planting flowers... and the washroom
seems strangely cleaner.
- Lightbulbs that have been
burned out for years are replaced.
- Some Clean Harbors dudes in
a white van are busy drilling test wells all around the building.
- The company suddenly
implements a "search all bags" policy at all the building
entrances, and they take just a quick glance inside of incoming
briefcases but a much harder look at everything being carried
out.
- You find you can no longer
copy files to a portable USB device.
- Managers disappear to a series
of mysterious off-site meetings, and tell you that "you know
more than I know" when you ask them what's going on.
- The capital equipment budget
mysteriously dries up.
- Roof leaks are actually being
patched, instead of putting buckets in strategic locations.
- The boss's secretary is apparently
under orders to wear short skirts.
- And you get a copy of Spencer
Johnson's "Someone Stole My Cheese" in your mail slot....
(seriously, watch out if this ever happens, it means you are gonna
get screwed!) Then you can decorate your cube with messages such
as "Imagining Myself Enjoying New Cheese Even Before I Find
It, Leads Me To It." Most engineers would choose inhaling
tailpipe in their closed garage before reading this book!
Good luck!
Check out the Unknown
Editor's amazing archives when you are looking for a way to
screw off for two hours or more!
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