What's with the
mask? He's not fool enough to give up his day job, that's what!
Yes, we did.
Warning... the following
message contains sarcasm, contact us for instructions on how to
recognize it if you are humor-impaired. If you don't like the
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Black History Month comes early
this year, as Barack gets sworn in on January 20. Before we get
look back at some relevant but perhaps random history, let's all
remember that the Great
Molasses Flood occurred 90 years ago on January 15.
Marian Anderson sings
A nontrivial question... seventy
years ago, Marian Anderson sang to a protest audience of more than
75,000 in front of the Lincoln Memorial. What were they protesting?
A view of the Marion Anderson's audience
Born in 1897, Marian Anderson
had a classical contralto
voice that conductor Arturo Toscanini said was "heard once
in a hundred years", so maybe her replacement will soon turn
up on American Idol. At the height of her career, the Daughters
of the American Revolution denied Marion the use of their Constitution
Hall in Washington DC because of her color. Remember, Washington
DC was officially segregated until after WW II. By the way, my daughter
is eligible to join DAR, enabled by some distant relative's boat
ride in the 1600's, but hopefully the righteous old ladies aren't
holding their breath, considering who would have to pay the membership
When Eleanor Roosevelt found
out what the DAR had done, she found a way to get Marion an alternative
venue. She convinced Secretary of the Interior Harold Ickes to let
the singer borrow the steps of the Lincoln Memorial for a recital
on Easter Sunday, April 9, 1939. Mrs. Roosevelt and thousands of
other blueblood American women resigned
their DAR memberships in protest. Thanks to our forefather radio
engineers, millions of people heard Marion's voice "live"
across the country!
My Country Tis of
Listen to Harold Ickes introductory
For Marion Anderson, the story didn't end in 1939. For years afterward,
she was banned from singing in Washington DC high school auditoriums
because she was black. She died in 1993.
Racial humor versus racist humor
It is possible to create racial
humor that isn't racist, but it's a tricky tightrope.
Rush Limbaugh's parody of Puff the Magic Dragon hit the radio
waves in March 2008. Apparently his listeners think that Barack
the Magic Negro this is really funny stuff, and that it's not
racist humor. Decide for yourself:
Barack the Magic Negro
Below is Mr. Limbaugh defending
the tune he created, telling listeners it's "one of the most
creative and funniest thing they ever heard", a classic example
that makes his program so successful. Mega-dittos to all!
Rush the Rascist Gasbag
Maybe it isn't
really humor, but there is a way to prove it's racist. Here's
how. Just paste a link to it into an interoffice email, and mail
it to some of your "negro" friends. If you are a Rush
Limbaugh listener, maybe you don't know any black people, so just
copy it to the head of human resources and tell him/her to forward
it to some random black people for their opinion. Here's an example
email you can use so you don't waste too much company time on
To: Negro coworkers
Subject: Too funny!
I saw this funny video
about Barack Obama on youtube and wanted to share it with
you. Click here!
I'm sure you'll find it
so funny, you will be doing "jazz hands" while listening
Your Main Man
Big Rush Fan
Let us know how that works
out for you!
While we're on the subject,
what's an example of "racial humor" that is not racist?
How about the following:
Little known to the people
of the Union States, Abraham Lincoln had an enormous taste for
wine that often got him into big trouble. Historians recently
uncovered audio tapes of some of his private meetings in the
Oval Office. On the morning of January
2, 1863, he awoke with a massive hangover. In his cabinet
meeting later that day he was heard to say...
I did what? I freed
Trying to defer a dream
The year 2008 was like no other
in modern history; the thin crusts of civilization and capitalism
both showed some major cracks. The former is illustrated in a
video of attendees at a Sarah Palin campaign event. The latter
is illustrated in your 401K account which we won't review here.
Palin around with imbeciles
In the least proud moments
of a political party since McCarthy, while Ms. Palin told her
followers that Barack was "palling around with terrorists",
they screamed "kill him". When did the party of Abraham
Lincoln become the party of bigots and bailouts? We'll cover that
in a moment, after a little poetry from the second poet cited
on this page if you count Rush.
A Dream Deferred*
What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
Like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?
* also know as "Harlem"
Langston Hughes, like Barack
Obama, was born from a racial mixture of black and white. His
writings explore the interracial relations of the twentieth century.
Pick up a copy of Hughes' The Ways of White Folks to learn
Now then, what man or men can
be held singularly responsible for ensuring that the Republican
Party is the official party of bigotry? The culprit was actually
the team of Democratic president John F. Kennedy followed later
by president Lyndon Johnson. When the Great
Society initiative became the law of the land in the 1960s,
Good Old Boys who were democrats for generations had to pick a
new party rather than associated with social reformers. Vietnam
was not the only reason Johnson didn't run for a second term in
1968. As for the party of bailouts, certainly Republicans have
not been immune to pork for many years, evidenced by their failure
to pass the Contract with America's
Fiscal Responsibility Act when they owned Congress. But the
title "Party of Bailouts" was more recently awarded
because of the 43rd President and his esteemed Executive Branch.
Over time, we're gonna get a lot of the money back
Certainly the Democratic Party
is just as bad at managing your money recently, and this may get
worse in 2009. The Troubled Asset Relief Program only became law
only when pork
Sec. 503: Exemption
from excise tax for wooden arrows designed for use by children.
This shameful pork comes from Oregon senators, and is worth $200,000
to Rose City Archery in Myrtle Point, Oregon
Sec. 317: Seven-year cost recovery period for a car race track
Sec. 308: Increase in limit on cover over of rum excise tax to
Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands
Sec 502: Incentives for films to be shot in the United States,
including those for adults
Sec. 211: Bicycle commuter benefits that allow employers to pay
for employee bike repair
Sec. 325. Duty suspension on wool products and wool research fund
and wool duty refunds
Sec. 201. Changes in bonus depreciation for biomass ethanol plant
A good-bye song for George
George Bush has a -6 dB approval
rating on the eve of his exit; and that one-out-of-four individual
who still likes him might no longer admit it in public to save
face. Here's a proposed litmus test to out a Bush lover.
Ask him/her to watch the Pete Seeger video below. If they enjoy
the video and don't see that Seeger is using sarcasm, you have
found a Bush fan. Be a good friend, help them get into a recovery
What Did You Learn
in School Today? by Pete Seeger
Finally, here's a quote from
someone who remembers that Marion Anderson broadcast...
six-volume history of Lincoln provides plenty of evidence that
the Rush Limbaughs were present, even in those days.....some things
that they said about Lincoln are almost unbelievable. But, thankfully,
the Limbaughs will fade in time, leaving only the Lincolns.